2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
