She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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