the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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