Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
do nipples grow back?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
