And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
