Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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