what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
