all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
