remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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