i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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