i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
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