I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize
