And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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