we're blogging at a bar
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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