do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Randomize
