So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
