just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize