just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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