so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
