Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
the condom got lost in my hair
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
