i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Houston, we have a blender
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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