whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Just high enough for therapy.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
