I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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