Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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