party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
She even gives head with a lisp.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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