What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
