You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Randomize
