I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Dignity is for republicans.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
In other news, I just burned my penis
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
