bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Holy sore nipples Batman
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize