I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
you will always have a special place in my vag
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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