Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
