they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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