Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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