Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize