I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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