I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
