great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
That was before I lit my hair on fire
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
