So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
