You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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