I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
