is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
