you didnt know i had herpes?
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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