I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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