Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
