All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
