I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
