i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
