The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
