You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
