Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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