I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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